This post will detail a concept similar to goals achievement and prioritization - specifically focusing…
This post is mainly for single/divorced Men Over 40, but married guys can definitely gain a thing or two, as fitness is always important for any human interaction. People cannot help but judge others at first glance – it’s a primitive survival mechanism that isn’t going away any time soon 🙂
What’s the first thing you notice when you meet someone new? Is it their intelligence, wit, creativity, ambition, emotional intelligence, social skills, kindness, integrity? Nope, it’s none of them. It’s their appearance and body language. Before they’ve had a chance to open their mouths your brain has already made a thousand calculations and assumptions about the other person. Pretty clever, right? Now, let’s go a little further with this.
You’re about to be introduced to a woman whom you’ve never met before, by your friend at a house party. She’s attractive. He is bringing her over to you, and you catch her eyeing you up and down when she thinks you’re not looking.
In this very brief up-and-down assessment, is she judging your intelligence? Your humour? Your ability to provide her with a lifestyle that looks good to all of her friends and family? No, it’s a primal thing and it’s not something she can really control.
Differences Between The Sexes
Men are visual, obviously, everyone on the planet knows this. Men are visual until the day they die. Women, less so. But they are still visual to some extent, and you can see this in the very common example above. Guys will say that your physique is irrelevant, especially in the winter, and I partially agree with what they’re saying, in that your physique isn’t as important as in the summer. But people aren’t stupid, and their hindbrains can still tell when someone is in excellent condition.
There are numerous ways people do this:
- You can see a protruding gut through clothes
- You can easily tell if someone has a good shoulder to waist ratio with or without clothes
- Women can spot a good ass through clothes (this one often gets overlooked as it’s been popularised as a female endeavour on Instagram, even though I can assure you it’s not), and possibly most important of all;
- Your face is almost always a giveaway if you have too much body fat – chubby faces and double chins are less attractive than chiseled faces
Now, I’m not saying looks are the most important thing, they’re not. They become less important over time (unless you turn into a land whale over time). But if you want to maximise your positive first impressions with the most amount of people, you would be wise to maximise your looks.
Women will also say that they just want a nice guy (bless ’em), but they’re not necessarily giving you the entire truth. They do want a nice guy, but this is assuming that this nice guy is:
C) Physically attractive
Looks always factor in, and they can, and often do provoke a primal response in women, despite what they claim they want.
Assuming you want to capitalise on this, what should Men Over 40 be shooting for?
Maximising Your Appearance
You don’t necessarily have to be Hugh Jackman in order to have an irresistible body that women can’t help but be attracted to. But, there are vast improvements you need to make if you want to have that “wow” impact on people you meet for the first time.
Looking at the above four:
- Reduce your beer belly. Measure your waistline on a daily basis, and aim to reduce it noticeably every single week.
- Improve your shoulder to waist ratio. This ties in directly with reducing your beer belly, and it’s the quickest way to improving your ratio. There’s plenty of skinny-fat guys who don’t have a big waistline, but they’re no better off than larger guys as they have terrible shoulder circumferences. Build your upper body up; particularly your shoulders and back, and this will improve. Also focus on building up your neck and traps.
- Squats are the best thing to improve your ass. I’m not talking bodyweight stuff, I mean proper, heavy squats. 12 months of squatting 2 times per week will make a huge difference.
- Losing body fat will sharpen your face up, and I would argue that this may be the most important of all, depending on whether or not you have a longer, genetically leaner looking face.
- Body language. Your posture also says a lot about you – a straight back with your chest out looks a lot more attractive than Quasimodo The Hunchback.
Looks may not be the most important thing in the long-term, but having that “wow” factor will do you a lot of favours. It gives people good first impressions (and sets interactions off to a smooth start), generally makes your life a lot easier, and improves your self-confidence.
Get to work.
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